Spread The Love - Through The Flower

   Through The Flower - My Struggle As A Woman Artist by Judy Chicago was a book I read this past week. There were many profound ideas presented between its covers and, I must admit, I was duly inspired. Keep plugging; it seemed to say to me. You are not alone. Many female artists do not have large studios to work in, despite what is depicted in major magazines - we are called "kitchen artists." Judy Chicago also participated in the feminism movement in the 1970's. She began an all-woman course of arts in Los Angeles. She opened a co-op gallery in that city as well. However, one of the main issues of the book, of having men understand women's art, was not satisfactorily solved.

   I realize I'm stating the obvious when I say that women experience the world from a different point of view then men do. It's only natural and there is nothing wrong with this difference. However, when women are not respected for the people (and artists) we are, just because someone has a difference of opinion regarding a work of art, then we have a major problem. And despite all the progress we've made, there is still to a certain degree, where our own culture still indoctrinates women to be second-class citizens. We are taught that our natural bodies are not good enough, (Google any story on how much Photoshop and other portrait software is used in the advertising industry), to question our thoughts due to hormones, as well as second guess ourselves on a regular basis (ie; hormones again). The family unit is too dysfunctional. Love takes a backseat (or gets stuffed in the trunk), divorces happen and any children can become pawns in an egotistical tennis match between two people who now, for some reason or other, hate each other. And guess what? If you can't cut it, you just might as well just end your life, because you're never going to be good enough anyways.

   Whew! Got a bit deep there, for a moment. So - where am I going with this? To be totally honest, I'm not sure. I realize that I cannot single-handed change society. I did, however, find a way for me to BE alive, well, and functioning to the best of my ability within this society. It works for me. You are going to have to do some self-discovery of your own, but feel free to use my example if you wish.

   I followed my heart and did what I thought was best for myself as well as my family. I tried, to the best of my ability, to be a good role model for my daughters to pursue their passions career wise. I deeply love all four of my grandchildren and participate in their lives as much as I am able; building relationships, loving them, and respecting them for who they are. I try to nurture their gifts and talents. I tell them, as much as possible, to be the best person they can be.

   Through experience, I learn. This past week was highly interesting and served up prime examples. At the beginning of the week, I was able to listen to a friend as she experienced her child leaving the nest a year earlier than expected. I had been through that change, not once, but twice. And both experiences were different on their own levels. I knew her pain and was able to hold her up as best I could. I did the same to support her when she thought no one else would understand.
   A second friend that I met up with mid-week, said her and her husband were separated after 10 years of marriage and would divorce soon. As she filled me in on other details, as we hadn't seen each other in about two years, I was floored - I was not ready for that revelation. That conversation made me appreciate my husband Dave even more and the relationship we've built up over 33 years. I'm still a firm believer that marriage involves effort on a daily basis by both parties.
   By the end of the week, another friend began a new job and she was stressed with all her new responsibilities. However, as she was becoming more familiar with it, the more she liked it.

   While on the walk with my third friend, I zoned out for a moment thinking about all the drama that goes on in everyone's life, mine included. I was in my own head so much, that I walked out in a crosswalk only paying half-attention and almost got run over by a tourist. I didn't matter that the first lane of traffic had already stopped, that there was a police officer standing about ten yards away, and that I yelled at the out-of-state driver - who just stared straight ahead. There's also the fact that it's a state law to stop for pedestrians in crosswalks. About 20 minutes later, as my friend and I strolled the boardwalk, a women was passing by us and mentioned that she was the one who stopped in the first lane of traffic and was sorry that the other driver didn't even bother slowing down. I thanked her with my heart welling up with love. That evening, Dave said, "I'm glad that you're alive." "Me too", I replied.

   I heard a story once of a boy on a beach full of starfish. The boy was throwing starfish back into the water. At the same time, an old man was walking past and asked the lad what he was doing. "I'm throwing them back in the water.", the boy replied. "What's it going to matter? There are thousands of them here.", the old man chided him. The boy responded, "It made a difference to that one I threw back." 

   Last Thursday, Dave and I got together with our youngest daughter and her two boys. We played a rousing game of tag on and around a jungle gym at a local playground. After a while, I noticed a piece of equipment off to my left near a fence. I asked Dave about it, said it was a sea-saw, and we checked it out. This see-saw was nothing like what we had as kids - there was room for four people, the seats were very comfy, and one could never be slammed into the ground. A politically-correct see-saw if you will. Dave climbed into one seat, and I in another, and we got a good rhythm going. I was transported back to when I was five years old - no cares, no worries, no thoughts, other than having a blast at the present moment. I was overcome with feelings of pure bliss.

   In the end, I had a week full of experiences; interactions with people and read about another persons life experiences. Experience came in each moment. Each moment that comes together and forms a life. On numerous evenings last week, I had sore feet and tired legs from all the walking and playing. Dave asked, "Was it worth it?" I replied, "Most definitely. My soreness proves a life well lived."

   Until next time, how's your life going?
   Jill

Spread The Love - For Whom The Horn Blows

   As I write this, it's Saturday morning on the 5th of August. The lights are down low, the fog has rolled in, and for some reason, all I can think of is the poem that was written by Ernest Hemingway, "For Whom The Bell Tolls". My husband Dave and I are listening to mellow jazz on the laptop via the internet. The instrumental song that's currently playing is featuring mellow saxophone and other brass horns. I'm relaxing on my sofa - it has been a long but satisfying day.

   Satisfying, not necessarily in art, but with family. Here in Rockland Maine, we are knee deep in the annual Lobster Festival. Dave and I picked up our two oldest grand-kids this morning and checked out the hour long parade that started at 10 o'clock. However, about an hour before the parade commenced, roads were already blocked off, traffic was extremely heavy, people were confused, state and local police were extremely polite and professional, and yes, car horns were blowing. We managed to park on a quiet side street, near a grove of trees, and walked the half-mile to the beginning of the parade route, which by the way, flows from three major streets into one. It's like watching a parade and a detoured traffic jam at the same time. We managed to nab the exact same spot as last year, so we were all pumped.

   Before the parade started, two large school buses pulled up to this 3-way major intersection, stopped, and then approximately 100 men in white sailor suits exited. Then the buses had to be escorted down a 4th side street past some parade floats. More horns and sirens. A good friend of mine named Signe was on one of the "floats" - technically a red convertible Mustang. The Lobster Festival has been in existence for the past 70 years. Every year, votes are cast for a young woman to be that years Sea Princess. Kinda tacky, I know, but somewhat historical. My friend was the very first Sea Princess back in 1949. Dave and I spotted her, waved, and loudly wished her well. She waved back and got the young man who was driving the vehicle to toot the horn.

   As the parade proceeded, participants passed out candy, school supplies, necklaces, frisbee's, and coupons. Needless to say, our grand-kids made out like bandits. A little after 11 o'clock, the 70th float passed, thus signaling the end of another annual parade that had been filled with sirens, guns, laughter, music, cheering, and applause. And yes... horns. Once the last float slowly drifted out of sight, the sidewalks and streets were filled with people folding up their chairs and walking back to their cars. We followed likewise. Along the way back to our car, we ran into several people and floats making their way back to the high school where they started from. Some participants on the floats had leftover candy and tossed even more to the grand-kids. Like they needed it.

   Once we piled our chairs as well as ourselves into our car, we made a quick U-turn, and headed for a major road. Gratefully, other vehicles let us out and we zoomed back to our house within minutes. Once inside, we engaged in a rousing game of Phase 10 until it was time for lunch. It wasn't long before that time hit. Since no one could decide what to eat, it was off to Subway. Dave took the children in to order their food, while I waited for our oldest daughter to meet us there. Food was eaten, a little shopping was done at the big-box store in the same plaza, and our daughter told stories of her recent vacation with her family.

   After we all departed ways, Dave and I went to a photo center to pick up his large prints for our upcoming art shows. He was pleased at the results. Once back home, I had a project planned for this weekend, and I began in earnest. The mission - I need to declutter. My paintings have officially over-run my studio. They are in all corners, under tables, behind furniture, and take up a large closet. Never mind my easels, paint supplies, paper, and canvases... and my framed works for the upcoming gallery showings. A fellow artist friend of mine offered me a space in her immaculate "barn" that's next to her studio and mentioned to me that the two of us could have a combo art / yard sale in September. She was excited about not only helping me solve my clutter problem, but hers as well.

   Unbeknownst to her, this "decluttering" is a major undertaking for me. Not only to unearth them from their current resting places, but to go through them and to make sure they are all signed and titled. Some titles came easily, some required more thought. I ended up signing and titling about 50 works, went through about 50 more that had already been done, and put them in moisture-proof protective containers. I haven't even tackled the closet yet!I started thinking - should I blow the horn on this entire project?

   When a person creates a piece of art, they put a part of themselves into each creation. Each of these paintings I think of as a child. Unfortunately, over the past few years, most of them have been in some sort of storage mode for at least the past few years. Some I didn't get the chance to hang at all for my enjoyment. There comes a time when you have to let go. I want to say I'm ready to do this, but in reality, I'm not. I feel as if a large part of my SELF is being ripped out of me... thus, "for whom the bell tolls"... me. Does this mark the end of my painting forever? No - from here on out, I'll be doing it on a much lesser scale.

   It's been said, "When the student is ready, the teacher will appear". For me - when the child is ready to fly on their own into the world, they will do so. I've invested a great deal of time and energy into these paintings. I've filled them with the love that was in me. Now it's their turn to bring love into the lives of new owners. I am spreading the love. May this transition pass smoothly. I've read that death is just passing from one room to another - that's easy enough.

   Until next time,
   Jill

  

Spread The Love - Plant Seeds & Sing A Song

   "You have to believe in happiness or happiness never comes." - Douglas Mallock

   You've probably noticed that this week's blog is shorter than most, mainly because I'm asking a cake-load of rhetorical questions. But I want you to think about them. You'll also notice by the time you get to the bottom of this week's post, the title becomes more clear. What if we all behaved as if we were coming from the depth of humanness which is our pure love essence? Imagine a world where everyone chose to be happy... chose to show empathy... and all of life's problems weren't taken so seriously. What if people had faith that a loving God or Higher Power was in charge and everything is alright - always?

   Now before you think I've really gone off the deep end, hear me out. In the country of bali, they have a saying that basically means, "It's no problem." and/or "It's no big deal." What if people didn't get offended at another person's behavior? Even if we didn't agree or even approve of that behavior? What if everyone decided not to rush around on a daily basis, because they realized the world did not revolve around them? What if, while at work, (or even at home), took breathing and centering breaks every hour or two?

   Now - what if I did? I can honestly say my world would change. No matter what else is going on - I would have a good day. And if you and I happened to cross paths today - it would become a benefit as well as a bright spot in both our days. Wouldn't it be grand if we went around reminding each other, in one form or another - "Be human today."

   Until next time, let's all re-humanize ourselves.
   Jill

Spread The Love - No Limits On Love

   As I write this, a mellow jazz ensemble plays in the background and I'm reclining on my sofa elevating because my feet are sore. Why are my feet sore? Because it has been an absolutely spectacular day. You couldn't bribe Mother Nature for better weather in the 3rd week in July - it was wall to wall sunshine, temperatures in the low 70's, and low humidity... and an afternoon sea breeze! What did my husband and I do all day? We spent six hours outdoors with our eldest grandkids. It may have been a bit on the excessive side, considering they are now pre-teenagers, (and we're both in our 50's), but we didn't get a chance to see them last weekend due to the rainy weather.

   Our oldest daughter brought them one of our favorite swimming hangouts. Normally, we pick them at my daughters house, but today held the annual Lobster Bike Race, where the starting point of this madness is approximately three-quarters of a mile from her home. The road she lives on is the first leg of this race, and any attempt to exit her driveway is extremely difficult. Not only is it a narrow, waterfront road that has lots of winding curves, but there is no shoulder what-so-ever. There are lots of old summer cottages close to the road and one can only imagine the insane dance with regular street traffic and approximately 250-300 cyclists filling the road all jockeying for position. It is a race, you know, and it's every person for themselves. Damn the traffic and traffic laws. All entitlement - no limits... and no love.

   Once at the small park where we swim, the grandkids said their goodbye's to their Mom, quickly said hello to Dave and I, stripped off their street clothes, (their swim suits were on underneath), flung off their flip-flops, and made a b-line for the water. My grand-daughter commented on "how warm" the water was. I wasn't so sure. However, it didn't matter to her as she loves swimming. I noticed the other people at the beach; they all had canoes and kayaks. They would be enjoying the water without getting wet.

   By now, both grandkids were beckoning me to come into the water. I ran interference and sent my husband in my place. Even though he said the water wasn't cold, I still wasn't convinced. I told my family I would go in the water when I was hot enough after soaking up some rays. I find as I get older, I love being warm. I don't like the cold. When I was a child, I didn't have this love / hate relationship with temperature. However, after about an hour, my bored grandson asked me for probably the fourth time if I was coming in for a swim. I knew the water temperature hadn't climbed ten degrees in the past hour, but I love my grandchildren more than being cold.

   As I made my way into the water, it was truly bath water until I was up to my lower shin, but as I traversed deeper into the lake, it felt colder. By the time I was waist deep, I was almost shivering. The breeze blowing down the length of the lake didn't help matters. Plus I knew it was only a matter of time before my darling grand-kiddos would be splashing me anyways. Young kids are like that. They want to share their love of the water... whether I wanted the same or not. We had a pleasant swim - out to a diving dock and back, which was about a total of 400 feet in distance. When I was a young adult, swimming this distance was a cake-walk. I also found swimming very relaxing. I still do - only now, I'm realizing just how out of shape I am!

   I realized that even though the water was colder than I liked, I need to love myself more. My husband and family can only do so much. I have the final say about what and how much I eat, what I think, how little (or a lot) I beat myself up, and how much activity I can do to keep myself healthy. In other words, how much I positively engage with myself. I know I'm not 25 anymore - but that doesn't mean I have to become a vegetable that doesn't exercise and watch TV all day. Over the past two days, my husband and I spent a great deal of time outside. As a result, it has been a very busy weekend for us... and I wouldn't trade it for the world. I loved every moment of it.

   How about you? How was your weekend?
  
   Until next time, one exhausted Grammy,
   Jill

  

Spread The Love - "Moma Mia"

   The title for this week's blog cam from a Maine license plate that my husband and I saw while cruising through the small ocean town of Owls Head which is near our current home. Why did this plate stick out for me? Mainly because it was attached to a car that was in front of us being driven by a person who had absolutely no clue where they were going. The speed limit for the road we were on was 45mph, and the speed of "Moma Mia" ranged from 30 to 50. It was also possible that the driver was attempting to use some sort of GPS system while driving, because keeping the vehicle in the right hand lane was apparently not on the menu. When the vehicle made a sudden left turn, both my husband and I shouted, "Oi! Mama Mia" at the same time... and laughed.

   Another sign that caught my attention this week was on a window to the left on the entrance door to our local library; "Make The World Better". I've been pondering this concept all week. How can I make the world a better place? The answer came to me in the form of a book written by Italian author Leo Buscaglia entitled, Love.

   That's it, I thought - spread the love. To live in love is the greatest challenge in life. As a human endeavor it requires flexibility, sensitivity, understanding, acceptance, tolerance, strength, and knowledge. One has to become vulnerable, in a positive way, to offer and accept love. In seems in today's society that empathy is gone. Society seems to reserve no place for honesty, tenderness, goodness and concern. It crucified Jesus, got Gandhi shot, beheaded Thomas More, and poisoned Socrates. Any person or thing that moves them to change is fair game.

   To cope with what we find and to still live in love, we must have strength. This strength comes from inside. We must recognize only goodness even where evil exists. We must visualize love as the greater force. A loving individual has to care for her / himself. Everything that filters through me and out into the world is beautiful, wondrous, and tender. Love is always in the process of becoming. All life is growing, seeing, feeling, touching, and smelling. Every individual is unique. People need to discover who they are and develop themselves into the best person they can be, whether they are a minister, artist, chef, or business person. It is a blessing that you are different from me.

   Be spontaneous; laugh and feel good while you're laughing. Trust your own gut feelings. We need not be afraid to touch, feel, and show emotions. Love is a learned behavior. In our upbringing, some of us were never taught to be a "touchy-feely" person. We have to live now, in the moment, and relate to others the best we can. Everyone has there own beauty. The only reality is here - what is happening right now between you and me. Catch the beauty of each moment to the best of your ability. Every day is also a now. We are adjusting to a staggering number of changes constantly. As a result, you are constantly becoming; adjusting to whatever changes. Each experience is new and/or different in some way. Believe it or not, we are on a fantastic journey - if we have the right mindset.

   Dave and I walked down by Harbor Park in Rockland Maine and took in part of the 2017 North Atlantic Blues Festival. There were many people, both locals as well as tourists. We enjoyed listening to the tunes, by the ocean, in a shade-providing gazebo. We also noticed a vast sea of parked vehicles in every parking space imaginable. One vehicle, however, caught our attention. It was an old vehicle from the 1930's and it's style is called a "rat rod". My husband told me that rat rods are certain vehicles (mostly built from the late 1920's through the 40's), that imitate (and sometimes exaggerate) the early years of hot rodding from the late 40's through the 1950's. The vehicles look a little rough ans well as unfinished - at times, they look butt ugly. There was no internet and no after-market auto parts network back then. People used whatever they could and in many cases built their own parts. Another example of living in the now - because it was all they had.

   Until next time,
   Jill

Spread The Love - At Peace

   The only way to have peace, is to be peaceful. Sounds easy, right? I can see your heads nodding thinking that I'm crazy. However, if you think about it, how we behave is what we get. Believe it or not, we can make a fear-free world by being unafraid at this moment. This, right here, right now, is the only moment we live in. We have to be full of integrity, be independent, self-governing and wild right now. The new world we are creating is one where everyone is guided by their own self-loving inner voice all the time. Note I said "self-loving"; not self serving or self-centered. We can't love anyone else until we love ourselves first. And loving ourselves does not mean we are the only thing or being that matters. Our bodies are transmitters that we have to listen to and take seriously.

   You know you are on the right track when you feel light, buoyant, full of hope, energy, and love. We think things that are truly freeing or behaving free in some way. We feel free in the present moment. I "am" right now, in this present moment, the way I hoped to be in some future new world. Ever since my husband Dave and I took our excursion to the southeastern portion of the US almost four years ago, I've engaged more with life. I practice seeing and feeling (the best to my ability) the vibrant colors around me. I feel the gentle breeze on my pours. I breathe in deeply and often. I touch everything (within reason). I'm not afraid - I've forgiven myself. I can finally say that I love myself and I am joyful.

   When enough of us hold a space in the cosmos where there is no opposition of each other, freedom will become a reality for all peoples in the world. Resistance doesn't work. It's the higher road not taken that surpasses brutality and will make it crumble in the end. It's the principle of non-resistance.

   The more we live in our new mindset, moment by moment, then it will become the general mindset of the planet, even though we are different in many other ways. It's not a black and white, one size fits all, type of conformity. We are all unique individuals, but we all live in the moment, not bound by the negative bullshit that divides us. Living today as if the new world were already here - heaven on Earth, then it will be.

   The feelings of fearlessness, joy, and peace will ignite behaviors consonant with them. Once people feel their self worth, they will behave in a worthy manner. We'll no longer behave like "slaves". Once we respect ourselves, we can respect others. Do we see a pattern here yet? To live one's life in every way you dreamed of becoming, as if the world were as you wished it were, I hope for transcendence.

   Integrity is the source of all power. It stems from loyalty to one's higher self. I want compassion and integrity for myself. When I can understand and love myself, I will be merciful and kind to others. This brings out the best behavior in everyone.
 - "The meaning of life is to be alive."   Sonia Johnson.

   Enthusiasm is my daily exercise. The human condition, ie; what we've been taught, is perpetuated by every aspect of our culture and society. "Conditioning defines human nature, our relationships to one another, ourselves, the universe, and the divine." There has always been another reality in our mindset. It is one of beauty, peace, happiness, positive power, kindness, abundance, and creative joy.

    Transformative acts I can do today include the gamut of life; everything from recycling, conserving water as well as other resources, walking, biking, eating correctly, claiming my full spiritual self, respecting others, laughing often, breaking addictions, and live life to the best of my ability.

Until next time,
Jill

Spread The Love - Making Connections Part 2

   Last week we we're touching on various subjects, such as what makes you happy? How do you spread the love? Becoming aware, living life consciously and discovering how we want to live. This week, we'll continue in that vein and see where it takes us.

   Last week  I also mentioned that my husband Dave and I have been learning to live by our inner light - a process that has taken a number of years. The good thing is, we have been given the gift of time (even with our busy schedules) to explore our inner potential. I've had several people tell me they are busy enough as it is; they do not have any more free time to "explore their inner selves". Bullshit. If you have the time to check your email 15 times a day, text God knows how many people 50 times a day, and be on Facebook or watch TV for more than an hour each day, you have the time. By exploring our inner potential, we have learned to consult our own inner wisdom and have practiced listening to that "small, still voice" within. This gives our lives meaning; a sense that what we do makes a difference, regardless of how small.

   Dave and I have lived by our values, sought our own truths, and were thought of as crazy by all those who know us. At times, our friends and family do not know what to make of us. We are the opposite of what this world would have us believe - that purchasing goods will make you feel better or make you a better person. Love is the cure for this mental, material sickness. Only when you truly discover who you really are and learn to love yourself, will you be able to love others.

   I love beauty and try to focus how I can bring more of it into our lives. One of the reasons Dave and I moved from Massachusetts to Maine 20 years ago was because of the beauty at the ocean's edge. Besides painting the local scenery, I also envisioned creating a homestead on five acres with our own livestock. Dave was all for the move, however he never truly saw himself as a "farmer" with live animals. Unfortunately, we never really discussed this aspect BEFORE we made the geographical move. When we arrived in Maine, we rented a large Victorian house on 2 acres and the only "livestock" we were allowed were our dog and cat. Granted, I always wanted to live in a Victorian house, but now my scheduling of life (read: expectations) was a little off.

   However, living in a rural community in Mid-Coast Maine gave us the opportunity to investigate living in that town without making the huge financial leap of purchasing a house. It also gave us ample time to explore the entire area and county. After about two years, we realized that the town was a little too small and rural. So we moved to the next town east, rented there for approximately four years, and then purchased an old farmhouse on about an acre of land that needed work. Once there, I came to the realization that I am a flower gardener - not a vegetable gardener. No matter what I did, or how I tried, I just couldn't get any vegetables to grow outdoors. So much for homesteading.

   Changes come about by a moment by moment awareness. Life itself has opened and closed doors on us. We've had to learn, sometimes the hard way, as well as to grow and adapt. Being grateful for what we have in our lives; our health, our family, and our friends. We had to stop drifting along the river of life and ask ourselves some probing questions; How shall we live? What makes us happy? What is the "good" life?

   Inside emptiness comes from not meeting our real needs for self-worth and community. This is why consumerism will never totally satisfy you or any of us. We must discover our passions, be with friends, live in harmony with nature, and get close to a power greater than ourselves and/or God.

   "Each man's life represents a road towards himself." - Herman Hesse

   Living one's passion is the ultimate experience of feeling alive and connected. Confluence: a flowing together - completeness. Not feeling estranged. Be authentic and say, "This is who I am!" Find your passion. When we are all use our creative power, we become generous, joyful, lively, bold compassionate people.

   You'll notice I've once again included my oil painting of the two cows once again this week. Here's part two of the reason why I'm posting this painting. I'm starting a new project - "Adopt A Painting" - these "project" paintings do not have to fed, watered, walked, or be cleaned up after themselves. The don't need medical attention from a doctor or veterinarian. It is the ultimate house guest - they don't make any noise, don't hog the bathroom and/or shower, and after three days, they don't get annoying. All they do is radiate love from your wall. I have numerous paintings I am selling at extremely competitive prices in an effort to drastically reduce inventory before my next studio is built. I am downsizing once again, and these works of art need good homes. Fee free to email me through this blog, or message me via Facebook - just don't spend an hour doing it...

Until next time,
Jill